Hold On

Before the pain, she laughed beautifully and wrote her name,
and after it came, it brought lifelessness and dark rain;
but she was never told that she was not to blame,
so when she cried, she was ashamed — and sorrow,
consternation, and anger boiled in her veins.
Though she may pass feigned smiles, if you look into her eyes,
it is there that great pain lies—
draining her joy and her essence through a forced disguise.
But there is a quiet strength that fuels the fire of hope,
and in that hope she survives, pushing back against fear and its lies;
tears constantly fall, and somehow in a desolate place, she manages to smile.
Her tears are dried and looking through gorgeous eyes,
she will abide and make it through the night.

The Tormented

Anguished screams narrate the bowels of hell in all its depths.
Perpetual falling of dark rain washes away the blood after the opening of veins.
Lost in desolation, if they escape death, when they come back — they are never the same.
The bloodstream craves euphoria to numb unceasing pain,
but after the sun rises, sorrow still remains.
They fall to their knees and weep in sincere praying, but sorrow still remains.
Please take away the pain. They cry earnestly, please take away the pain.
But there is no change — they wail before the sun rises, but there is no change.
They want the world to know their names.
They so desperately want the world to know their names;
and feel the warmth of the sun again.
They want to feel the embrace of the warmth of the sun again.
Agony seems to never end.
The torment seems to never end.

Imminent Destruction

There must be no safe space for them;
they must not be allowed to strike again.
They must be burned in the fire of the pain of their victims,
and have their ashes taken away by the wind.
History must only mention them in the context of, Never Again.
They must be condemned, and the womb they were conceived in.
They must be forced from their secret places in the darkness of the early morning,
and be left as sustenance for ravens, before the appearance of the red sky of the evening.
They must experience one thousand times fold, the torment of their victims;
left to contemplate their fate, shaken, by the sounds of their own breathing.
They will not be mourned in their leaving;
no beautiful floral arrangements;
no carriages with black horses, with blinders waiting;
no tears of elderly women, with silk gloves in black veils grieving.
In their final moments, the terror of their destruction will be upon them.

gods in our dreams

We were in so much pain,
but it is pain we did not know we were in.
In our numbness, we did not feel it.
In our darkness, we did not see it.
Through the wailing of our own voices, we did not hear it;
yet we were immersed in it,
somehow, still being able to breathe.
We were listless, and in death,
we were not able to grieve.
Afraid to be awakened,
we were gods in our dreams;
for so long, we were gods in our dreams.
We survived in our numb state,
but then we longed to feel;
for so long we longed to feel.
Then the pain came again,
and it was then we knew it was real;
my god, it was so real.
But we harnessed it, and a fire was lit—
that revealed a truth that was concealed;
for long it had been concealed,
that we were gods among men.
We were gods among men, indeed.

The Darkness of Secrets

The womb of past secrets is stretched in agony,
longing to give birth to what is long hidden and unspeakable;
but its child is stillborn and unmourned,
because dark whispers do not make it past closed doors,
to tell accounts of what was — and the pain that still lingers.
Vengeance is dreamed of, and always tingling on the tips of the fingers.
The heart refuses to fully heal, until there is a reckoning of monsters.
They can no longer live in hiding, plotting; planning.
They must be drawn out, and utterly rooted out by their victims, limb by limb;
even the blood, bone, and sinew of them must not remain.
Nothing shall be left of them — not even the whispers of their names.
After they inflicted anguish, torment and pain
nothing again, ever again, was the same.

Diary of the Dead

Witness the depths of his agony; hear his weeping.
See him immersed in the throes of his suffering.
Feel the warmth, that he so desperately wished could comfort him.
Touch the tears that fell on his torn adornments.
Write down the utterances that he conveyed in listless moments.
See the illegibility of his handwriting in his last moments,
because he hadn’t slept in days — and was so tired.
Hear him speak of his plight, and how hard he had tried.
Take notice of the dark curtains in the cold room he cried.
Read the torment of the unfinished notes he wrote —
strewn on the bed where he lied.
Witness the gradual stillness of his body
and the stark motionlessness of his eyes.
Hear the piercing screams later that night,
and the constant whispers of why.
See the favorite picture he left on the dresser, of happier times.
Feel the cold raindrops, as he is carried outside.
Speak to the ones who really loved him,
and hear the echoing of his pain in their cries.
See the black veils, and feel the chill of the winds that wail
at the place where he lies.

Martyred Heart

The broken heart is a martyr of love,
giving of itself until the very end
when there is there no more reconciliation;
it is cried over, again and again.
A picture of two lovers in happier times
is turned over, thrown, and intentionally broken;
the strewn shattered glass, denotes a deep pain unspoken.
The loving heart, loved with everything it had,
until it stopped beating and could love no more.
In a cold dark room, its martyrdom is mourned.
The once loving heart is turned to stone,
and it is warm no longer, but cold.
The once warm heart is cold;
it is so cold.

A Cry to Heaven

Heaven, please let the children dance again;

Let the hearts of tearful widows mend;

Restore breath to the lifeless and joy to the broken;

Let victims release their pain, through utterances of the once unspoken;

Let the deeply wounded begin their healing;

Let the numb immerse themselves in wonderful feelings;

Let the unloved find love through kisses and intimate gestures;

Let the motherless children of deceased mothers
hold them once again — and hear their whispers.

If Only You Knew

How beautiful you are in my eyes.
If only you knew that I see past
what others may think about you;
If only you knew that I see much
more than your physical attributes;
If only you knew your own value;
If only you knew that I refuse
to give up on you;
If only you knew that in the safety of my arms
I want to wrap you;
If you could only see through
my eyes what I see in you;
If only I could take away
the depths of pain in you;
You glow in my heart;
I see the diamond that is you.
When you walk by, they lust after you;
but in my soul I hold your heart—
and the essence of you.
I love you;
Your pain is my pain,
so until your heart is made whole,
I will weep for you.